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stabs:

it’s kind of weird knowing that when you sleep, you’re just looking at your eyelids but somewhere in your brain, you are able to produce dreams as if you’re still awake.  

centaurs-other-testicle:

japert:

Friends with mean and overprotective parents

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when they are so overprotective you guys can hardly hang out

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Being the friend with overprotective parents

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guy:

if u ever feel bad about urself just remember that mona lisa is one of the baddest bitches of all time and her eyebrow game weak lmao she ain’t even got any eyebrows

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thechurchofbobsaget:

I think “dildo” is a perfectly acceptable insult. Like, I’d call you a dick but you’re not real enough.